All anyone really needs for a good science fiction story is a good idea. Maybe it’s a new piece of technology, a massive societal shift, or a new world to explore. The best sci-fi ideas can leave room for multiple new interpretations, but sometimes a second attempt to capitalize on a single concept falls flat.
Remakes have undergone a full cultural lifespan over the past two decades. Mankind used to view them as essentially value-neutral, then each new example was the death of creativity, then they stuck around and became so common thatpeople just got used to them. However, it’s still extremely uncommon that any given remake could be better than its source material.
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Total Recall
Colin Farrell steps into the massiveshoes of Arnold Schwarzeneggerand predictably fails to fill them. Paul Verhoeven’s 1990 adaptation of Phillip K. Dick’s 1966 short story “We Can Remember It for You Wholesale” is a genuine classic. The practical effects still hold up 32 years later, the themes of identity and memory are communicated intelligently, and the action stands among the best of the era. Len Wiseman’s take on the material feels more like a shoddy attempt to recaptureBlade Runnerthan a new twist on Dick’s source material. The action scenes are well-handled and the decades of improvement in VFX technology are noticeable in the visuals, but the spirit of the film is missing.Total Recall2012 looks and sounds good, but it simply can’t recapture the powerof Verhoeven’s creative vision.
Robocop
The early 2010s were rough for Verhoeven fans. FirstTotal Recall, thenRobocopgets the same treatment. It’s hard to imagine anyone looking at one of themost gloriously violent films ever madeand deciding on a PG-13 rating for the remake, but someone did.Narcosseries producer José Padilha directed the film, putting considerable effort behind a largely unsalvageable film. Joel Kinnaman takes the starring role, though he’s largely drained of personality. UnlikeTotal Recall(2012,) which delivers lesser versions of the best parts of the original,Robocop(2014) doesn’t even attempt to live up to its inspiration. The film is generic in all the ways the 1987 original was special. It’s a boring film that lacks anydistinct identity of its own. It was forgotten before its initial box office release window closed, and it deserved it. Some remakes try their hardest and fall flat,Robocop(2014) doesn’t even try.
Flatliners
A lot can go wrong when remaking a beloved classic, but what happens when a less well-respected project gets a second chance?Joel Schumacher’s 1990 filmabout medical students experimenting with near-death experiences is controversial, but most agree that it has its strengths. It’s a fascinating film from a visual perspective, with a dreamlike atmosphere that will either grab the viewer or push them away immediately. Unfortunately, Niels Arden Oplev’s take on the concept manages to handle it with even less intelligence than Schumacher’s. It’s a dull and dreary affair, borrowing a lot of the plot elements of the original without its unique tone and presentation. Elliot Page and Diego Luna turn in decent performances, but they’re lost in the shuffle. Most critics agree that neither version makes the most of its interesting premise, but at least Schumacher demonstrated some interest in the bizarre implications.Flatlinersdies on arrival yet again, somehow even less lively the second time.
The Day the Earth Stood Still
It’s tough to remember now, but Keanu Reeves used to be viewed as one of the worst actors in Hollywood. The hate was always overblown, but the man does have some truly unpleasant performances. He appears in the role originated by Michael Rennie in 1951, and to hear him tell it, he saw something special in the remake’s portrayal of the character. It doesn’t come across on screen, however, as the film is primarily a boring retread without any of the intelligence of the source material. Director Scott Derrickson went on to a career in excellent horror films, but this 2008 outing demonstrates that he needed some work to perfect his craft. Like most remakes in the genre,The Day the Earth Stood Stillis heavy on contemporary special effects and light on anything meaningful.
The Thing
A decent cast, an accomplished screenwriter, and tens of millions spent on CGI can only do so much to fix a premise that failed before it began production. No one wanted a remake ofJohn Carpenter’s beloved classic, itself a remake of a 1951 sci-fi film and an adaptation of a 1938 novella. Mary Elizabeth Winstead and Joel Edgerton waste their time in this sad open admission to the weak justification for every other remake. This sci-fi remake fails outright because it only exists to profit off of a marketable name. It’s barely worth acknowledging as a failure because it was a cynical fool’s errand to begin with.
